Zen mojo & inspiration

Just when I was seriously gaining mojo momentum, I did a stupid thing. I went to see ‘Sex and the City’ yes, I let a movie bother me. How bizarre, especially since it’s just…oh why bother explaining it…all I can say is I wish someone had warned me of the content.

It didn’t help that I’d forgotten to eat all day, low blood sugar is never a good thing for me, but time just never expanded enough to accommodate eating : )

I have an alternate ending for Sex and the City,’ how about this, everyone goes to hell (very well-dressed, of course) for altering my previously pleasant state.

Ok, I’m shaking it all off as we speak…thinking Zen thoughts…

I wrote that part last night, when I could not sleep, I’m not sure if I ever did sleep, it might’ve been ‘dream’ torture, but I felt very awake. The lucid dreaming involved a ‘demon of the past’ shouting and I’d defend myself, and finally, that demon pointed its ugly outstretched hand at my ‘demon of the future’ who ranted similarly and again I defended myself…

It was so exhausting that at 5AM they finally let me go zzzzzz where I was rewarded with a dream about a baby. A Chinese baby. She had a disfigured head and I was trying to get her in a comfy position, when that moment arrived, she suddenly grew to standing age, about one year old. She stood up, her head shape was just fine and she’d grown a fringe of black hair, she wore a traditional long dress. She nuzzled her little head into my neck and shoulder and then hugged me like her life depended on it, I gave her the same kind of hug back, breathing in her sweet baby head smell.

Any dream interpretation book will tell you that the presence of a baby in dreams signifies upcoming ‘joy’ and historically, though it’s only happened a handful of times to me, it’s been true.

BY 5AM I also figured out exactly what part of that movie sent me into a funk, I will not reveal it here.

I’m heading to downtown’s jewelry ditrict hoping for some divine inspiration for a ‘Zen lll’ line of jewelry. Wish me luck, since, to date, I have not had one design pop into my head, maybe an ‘IT’ stone will just jump up and say, ‘pick me!’

Think I’ll eat breakfast first though : )

…and while I’m busy bitching, I have to tell you, I’m seriously getting tired of this picture…

One more life lesson: when your sleep deprived, don’t shave your legs!

Giving back, taking back…Yes, I want it all : )

I am always on the prowl for new things, ways, to give back…it’s been the focus of much of my Google searching this year, since returning from Singapore last June I would say. It’s like this: If you cannot be near the region/postal code lah, well, you have to act as if you are anyway…

Oh, did I also mention I am a serious procrastinator and that I’m actually looking for a paying job? Aaaah, you know, I’ll find one or one will find me, can’t be worrying about all that with so much on my plate already, right?

This charity organization caught my eye, the woman is beautiful and the tag lines, very provocative:

‘She has THE POWER to change her world. You have THE POWER to help her do it.’

Pretty powerful words, no?

http://care.org/getinvolved/women/?source=170740300000&WT.srch=1

Think I’ll help her right now and then…

I’ll help myself do that find a job thing, take some silver casting classes and jump start my comatose jewelry designs, maybe I’ll become inspired to make the Zen III line since I exhausted and sold all of lines l & ll; yeah, that and get my life/life force/mojo going again, yudda, yudda, yudda…

How I lost ANY of this stuff, even temporarily, to begin with, I do not know…

But, I will tell you this: I f**king want it all back NOW! hahaha…